but I cannot stop listening to "The First of the Gang to Die" for the past 12 hours. It's stuck in my head so very, very strongly.

Holy shit. . . This Town Needs Guns is fucking brilliant.

I am in awe. Or in love. I've yet to decide.

My beard is coming along. I can't wait to see it in a month.

Also, I'm addicted to breathsavers, and evidently when I take pictures, moving them around in my mouth causes me to look like a fish.

So, Erica is really sick. I didn't let that deter me from hanging out with her, and now I'm just worried about this congestion and sneezing and what not. I take my vitamins, drink plenty of water, eat healthy (okay, only mostly), and don't sit around all day long. Because of these things, I'm sure I have nothing in these regards to worry about.

Stress and lack of sleep can wear down your system I hear, though. Hopefully the poopy job I've been doing these past few weeks won't cause my body to be in big trouble, too. I was doing SO well for a minute, then my band had too much going on, and I fell way behind and then mid terms and two assignments snuck up on me. Oh well. The semester is not over, and I'm pretty good at most of this stuff, still.

We played music in Grand Rapids and Lansing this past weekend. This weekend we're playing in Ann Arbor. The next weekend we're playing in Grand Haven and Hartland. I'm looking forward to not playing on the weekends for a minute after that and spending some holiday time with the people I love. I dislike going home and not being able to even have ten minutes to sit down with my Momma and talk. The trade off of relationships/music is worse than ever these days, and my heart isn't bending at all in favor of the former. I really love doing this. It turns out it's even better when people actually like your music.

Some kid messaged us yesterday after watching us and said "in his book we're right up there with Brand New, The Honorary Title, and Forgive Durden," which I don't believe at all. Still. . . to be told that by a complete stranger, when we play the same show as Mae, Jenny Owen Youngs, and Deas Vail? I'll take it. I'll try to accept it. I will surely question if I should really be doing the college thing.

I'll question it, but tuition is paid, and I can't do the band thing full time right now anyways, so. . . on that note. . . I must head off to study the nature of language.

I'm dropping the ball right now. I fell behind, and then a couple of midterm's snuck up on me. I need to spend less time going to concerts, promoting, and more time reading.

Next semester, I need to take at least one easier class. I'm in no way screwed for the semester or anything, but I'm going to do prettttty bad on my History of Political Theory midterm. It's such an intense class! I love it very much, I just dropped the ball for a minute. In short: wake up call heard, and accepted.

We had an alternate professor in my Nature of Language course the past two class periods, and in that time we learned more than we had the entire course prior. It's just silly. It made me feel a little less prepared for that midterm, too. I think it's pretty weak that my two hardest classes have midterms on the same day. It made preparing myself feel too overwhelming.

This week has just been terrible. GF thought I was being a shitty boyfriend, when really I wasn't/am not. Things with the band are just intense. The more recognition we gain, the more responsibility I have to take up. Not to mention I just started working for Fusion Shows, and that's entailing a bit more work than I had anticipated. I like it all so much, though. It's just a matter of delegation, time management, and growing used to my newly found responsibilities. I can handle it. . . I'll take a hit right now, but in the long run, I know it's all worth it.

Oh, the other day I finally thought about how much easier life would be if I wasn't in a band. Like. . . really thought about it. As it turns out, it really would be. I bet my grades would be better.

However, I would likely lose my mind. I'm sorry to the friends I've lost because I define myself through the shitty music I make.

I finished reading "Is A Belief In God Good, Bad, or Irrelevant?" last night. I'm just excited to study religion academically. I've started dedicating a good deal of my "free" time to the study of the bible and other religious philosophies and texts. As far as "god" goes. . . eh. I'm not buying it. However, when entertaining the idea of God, I think that it's silly to try to justify the evil in the world by the idea that he works in mysterious ways. It's just a part of the world.

It's also strange how meaningless each individual life is in the grand scheme of things.

Anyways, it's due time I throw in the white flag on cramming a few weeks into six hours. That's not how this works. Instead, it's sleepy time.

I am in need of three things if anyone is selling/willing to trade:

- A keyboard amp (a Roland combo would be ideal)
- A direct box
- An all-in-one type record player



Anyone?

It turns out that I really like "Weeds" and "The Whitest Kids You Know." Thank you Netflix for assisting in this revelation.

Also, Weezer. I forgot how good Weezer is.

What am I thinking? I have too much reading to do to play livejournal. Sheesh.

I really don't miss having a job. I still might try to find one soon. Really.

When I ordered the new Owen record, it came with a cherry airhead. I loved it.

Today was local farmers day or something like that in the cafeteria, and it was some of the best food I've had in a long time.

Baked apples. Opes black bean burgers. All kinds of good shit, really.


Western is great. My classes are great. I think I might post pictures later if I don't have too much studying to do.

CD releases in nine days.

I woke up in Kalamazoo today. I'm going to be continuing to do so for a while now.

Tonight I'm drinking a bottle of wine and watching arrested development. . . living the good life.

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I'm house sitting at Scott Cutting's house this week. I've been playing piano and watching movies. Mostly, though, I've been going for drives. Taking in Muskegon for these last few weeks where I'll actually be resting my head here on a consistent basis has helped me to realize how necessary it is for me to finally leave. I know it's only a couple of hours away, but between all of the time I already spend gone with my band and semester's abroad and everything, I'm trying to prepare myself for quite a bit of time away from this town.

My Grandpa's service was sort of pleasant. It wasn't a service, actually. We just had a memorial service at a VFW and I had a few drinks with my family and talked about my Grandpa. I wouldn't have had it any other way, in all honesty. I like learning things about my family, even though I don't like that it's taken me 22 years to really start to learn who they are and where they come from. Stories, like how my grandparents met, just help put things into perspective. My Momma just deserves to be hugged a lot for the amount that she does for our family. I can't imagine having both of my parents completely gone. Things with my Father have been so fucked lately that it makes me go back to wondering if I really consider him here, so that puts my head on a strange train of thought.

Erica went to my family reunion this year. We drove separate to help bring all of my family there, and she and my cousin did fine together. She even put up with my cousin's son and Livvie in her back seat. It's odd to me. . . she handles my family better than I do. I'm just dickish. I don't mean to be. . . I do care about the people in my life. I can just tell by the way that people don't call, or talk to me when I'm around, and things of that nature, that I'm doing something wrong.

Also, I've decided that Desert Pepper Trading Company makes the best salsa consistently.

Oh, and my band is opening for Mae and Deas Vail. That is, we're opening for the two bands who made me want to start this band. Jenny Owen Youngs is on the show, too. We also posted some new tracks not too long ago. Casey Loring likes them, and that might just be enough for me. You could check them out too, though.

www.myspace.com/audreymichigan

The air is cold tonight. I'm hoping that means that it's going to start growing cold so I can grow my beard back and start wearing warmer clothes. I just prefer it.

Is it wrong that I hope Sara is deported? I just want some time with a friend. Also, all Canada has ever done right is being America's hat.

My Grandpa died yesterday. It's rough.

I didn't sleep as much as I should've. Sometimes I just have dreams that make me feel terrible.

I keep laying in this bed hoping that nobody comes in and bothers me. I really enjoy being able to just lay here and think for a while. Life is so strange lately. It's good, but it's surely strange. I enjoy waking up in different states multiple nights out of the week. I enjoy waking up next to Erica when I'm home. Sometimes I miss having a social life.

Everyday I look forward to moving to Kalamazoo a little bit more. I'm nervous about it. I know it's not THAT far away, but I've never lived even THAT far away from my family. It's just a little bit outside of my safety zone. I keep telling myself that it's going to be really good for me, but I can't help but wonder if I'm wrong, and if I'll be able to do a good job. I will. I have to, really. This is it.

Last week was Cornerstone and I met Traa from P.O.D. Last night we played in Macomb, Illinois and met some cool people, including a girl named Lindsay who was in the movie Eagle Eye. Tonight we're playing in Lafayette, Indiana. Tomorrow in Grand Rapids. Next weekend Lansing and South Bend.

Oh, and two nights ago I saw this guy and his band with Erica:



They played most of their songs. The venue was tiny and I was really close, and everyone had a good time without hurting each other. It made me feel really alive, and then very sore. I'm not 17 anymore.

It's taking much longer than anticipated. However, in that time, I discovered that I had wireless internet at my disposal.

I really like my girlfriend. Just, so much. It's difficult for me to express it, due to a pretty rocky romantic past. It really does seem to be the little things that count. She nails the big things too, though. It's sort of turned me into one of those guys who is all googly eyed about his girlfriend. Not terribly. . . but certainly more than I ever thought that I would be again. I'm just glad that I'm not too young to know what to do with those feelings anymore.

I still want an upright piano. Also, a Gibson J-200. I might buy one. In August. Everything is in August. Anyways, I'll probably start playing songs by myself again in public pretty soon. I might play at Hot Topic, which is funny. My band played there, and then I might. I'll probably have to go ahead and release a CD or something. I've been putting it off for a while, because the whole EP thing is centered around really strong feelings that I had for a while, and now the feelings have sat for so long. Most of them are sorted out and packaged away in their own little feeling cubbies, now. It's probably still a good idea. No, it is. I'm sure of it.

I leave for Cornerstone in a matter of hours. We're (Audrey) playing a couple of generator stages. Also, I'm going to see David Bazan, Copeland, Deas Vail, and many other bands I enjoy. It should be an interesting next few days/weeks. I'm largely just excited to be done with Cornerstone, as excited as I am for it. It will be nice to just enjoy my summer and give my bikes the love and attention that they deserve.

I enjoy gin and tonics.
I had a nice day, and am now going to go home and indulge.





Oh, and I still think too much.

15 hours in the studio yesterday. We're doing at least 8 more today, and have four more days left. I feel quite tired already, and I've yet to record a single track. Mic's kit sounds amazing, though. This EP is already coming together quite nicely. Sadly, we won't have it out by tour, as we'd hoped.

Game three of the finals is tonight. I went to game five of the semi finals. Erica surprised me with tickets as a late birthday gift. She's sort of amazing.

Anyways. . . I've been in the studio for many, many hours and I've figured out how to put pictures on here, I think.

( Catching you up on my adventures. )

But for now:

- I shaved the beard and now have a mustache.
- I just went for an hour and a half bike ride by Muskegon Lake and Lake Michigan with Shawnzie and Darby.
- Saw a lot of really good people tonight.
- Working on gathering up money for another guitar. . . while  being unemployed.
- I've had a girlfriend for about six months now.
- I leave for tour in just under a month.

My life is beautiful.
My hands are dirty.
Damn grips.

Erica is napping on our hotel bed in Mackinaw City. Yesterday we walked around the island, and today we went to St. Ignace. Tomorrow we're headed back home. It's been lovely, and I'll never grow sick of travel.

I turn 22 in a few days. 

 This weekend was fun. We played in South Bend with some really good bands. I booked a few more dates of tour. . . we're playing in some cafes, a rave type thing that's going to feature rock band, independent rap artists, and DJ's spinning. And some art preservation thing. I can hardly wait to see how it all shapes up in the end. 

We have our van now. I drove it yesterday, and it drives like butter compared to how it was. It took a while, but luckily, my mechanic is feeling better, and he does a really good job every time. I have a few basic maintenance things to take care of which I'm hoping to accomplish this week. Maybe even some today. Now I'm just waiting for my car to be fixed. 

I have to go to the bookstore to take care of some business relatively soon. I have to find out if I'm working this week, and set a date with Mike to go in and record my guitar tracks for a couple of songs. If I'm not working this week, John, Shawn, and I are going to stay in Indiana for a few days to work some more on writing. And hammering out this new song we wrote a couple of weeks ago. It's in D, and I wrote a piano part for it that is easy to over think, so I psyche myself out of being able to play it.

This time next week, GF and I will be on the highway. We're staying in a hotel room with a heart shaped jacuzzi. It's kind of ridiculous, but I'm really looking forward to it. 

One exam down, three more to go.